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No Men or Skinny People Allowed

8/23/2013

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Ask anyone who knows my husband well and they’ll tell you that he was born in the wrong decade.  He may have been raised in the 80’s and 90’s but his soul is in the 70’s.  It’s really strange.  He would (and always has) preferred to listen to the Isley Brothers, Gladys Knight, and Ray Charles over any more contemporary artists.  Same with TV shows.  It is sometimes painful to be in the same room with him when he has the remote.  He has a strange fascination with shows like Barney Miller, Soap, and that corny Twilight Zone knock off called Night Gallery.  I’m pretty sure if it were socially acceptable to walk around the prison in a leisure suit and platform shoes, he would probably do it.  

One other way that he is stuck in the 70’s is his lack of interest in all things related to social media.  He has a Facebook account but only checks messages periodically.  I am not sure I’ve ever chatted with him over Messenger and  I am pretty sure he’s never even looked at Twitter or Instagram.  It’s just not his thing.  Which is why I’m pretty sure that he rarely reads my blog and I am safe to talk about him.

In the most loving and respectful way possible, he makes me sick.  Actually, most men make me feel the same way but for the sake of today’s blog, I’m just going to single him out.  It’s just not fair (I don’t let my seven year old say that phrase but he doesn’t read my blog either so I am using it) that when it comes to weight loss, things come so easy for him.  He just cuts back on his food a little, adds some weight to his workout routine and BAM…abs.  A few walks around the block and VOILA…down three pounds.  I struggle and sweat and haven’t seen my abs since I was a toddler.  I can stick to a strict low calorie regime for a week and only go down one teensy little pound at times.  Blast my overabundance of estrogen and my lack of muscle mass!

It’s common knowledge that men tend to lose weight faster and easier than women do, which is why I have a hard time hearing things like, “I know you can do it - it’s just a matter of calories in, calories out” or “Just do it.”  Are both of those things ultimately true?  Of course.  But that isn’t ALL there is to it.  There are genetics, hormones, and mental roadblocks all at play and sometimes I think we all just need a fellow fatty pants to relate to.

So if you are a voluptuous gal such as myself, I just want to let you know that I GET IT.  It’s hard and it really, really, really stinks to try and lose weight.  You’re not the only one who has physical and emotional food cravings.  I do too.  I know how hard it is to force yourself to get moving. I hate to exercise.  It hurts sometimes.  Sometimes I can’t breath and I think I’m going to turn into a wheezing pile of sweaty flesh lying on the ground.  I also know that you think you can’t do it.  Most of the time I fight that demon myself.  But every person who has ever succeeded at losing weight and breaking bad food habits at least has to take actions as if you DO believe you can do it.  Fake it til you make it.

I know that men want to solve our problems - and I think that is why God made us all differently…because there is a place and a need for that characteristic.  But as women, sometimes the most motivating thing we can hear is that we are not alone and that someone believes in us.  So from one plus sized girl to whoever needs to hear it, you CAN do it.  It will be worth the effort even if you don’t lose the amount you want right way.  Do what you can and take it minute by minute if need be.  And when you are craving that cheeseburger and fries or wanting to shave a few crunches off of your workout for the day, just remember that I am here and I get it.

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