I laugh at my husband because he says that if Jillian Michaels were his personal trainer, he would body slam her. The screaming, drill sergeant type motivator does NOT work on him - they only provoke him to wrath. I, on the other hand, would take Jillian screaming at me all day long over even the most gentle pushes from him.
I kind of feel bad for him honestly. I can really be a hot mess.
On one hand, I desperately want and need his support through this process. On the other hand I don’t want him to give me advice. I want him to appreciate the changes that he sees in my body, but I don’t want him to be TOO excited. That would imply that he doesn‘t like the way I am right now. I want him to join in on this process and make it a journey that our family is going on together, but I get jealous that he has the ability to get up every morning to go to the gym. We are both working on helping our 7 year old to establish healthier choices. I totally project my own food issues onto him. If my husband tells my son he can’t have something specific to eat or makes even the slightest hint at a comment that I find to be not gentle enough, my hackles raise and I get defensive on his behalf (although I DO keep my thoughts to myself so we present a united front).
Like I said, I’m a mess.
I know that one of the keys to success is having a good support system in place around you. And I also know that my husband is the single most influential person in my life, and without his help and support this is never going to work. Right now I am just trying to figure out how to balance what I want from him and want I need from him. I’m all for advice and suggestions as to how you have found that balance with your spouse.
I may not know exactly HOW he can support me right now, but I do know that I want to be better FOR him. He deserves a wife who is healthy. He deserves a wife who is comfortable in her own skin. He deserves a wife who can be active with him and do the things that with him that he enjoys.
But maybe he should count himself lucky. If the Bible says that a man and a woman are supposed to leave their father and mother and the two should become one flesh, my husband has gotten a lot more flesh in this deal!
I kind of feel bad for him honestly. I can really be a hot mess.
On one hand, I desperately want and need his support through this process. On the other hand I don’t want him to give me advice. I want him to appreciate the changes that he sees in my body, but I don’t want him to be TOO excited. That would imply that he doesn‘t like the way I am right now. I want him to join in on this process and make it a journey that our family is going on together, but I get jealous that he has the ability to get up every morning to go to the gym. We are both working on helping our 7 year old to establish healthier choices. I totally project my own food issues onto him. If my husband tells my son he can’t have something specific to eat or makes even the slightest hint at a comment that I find to be not gentle enough, my hackles raise and I get defensive on his behalf (although I DO keep my thoughts to myself so we present a united front).
Like I said, I’m a mess.
I know that one of the keys to success is having a good support system in place around you. And I also know that my husband is the single most influential person in my life, and without his help and support this is never going to work. Right now I am just trying to figure out how to balance what I want from him and want I need from him. I’m all for advice and suggestions as to how you have found that balance with your spouse.
I may not know exactly HOW he can support me right now, but I do know that I want to be better FOR him. He deserves a wife who is healthy. He deserves a wife who is comfortable in her own skin. He deserves a wife who can be active with him and do the things that with him that he enjoys.
But maybe he should count himself lucky. If the Bible says that a man and a woman are supposed to leave their father and mother and the two should become one flesh, my husband has gotten a lot more flesh in this deal!
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