Three years ago my car broke down and I worried what people might say or think if they found out that the reason why I was stuck at home instead of driving our second vehicle was because I couldn’t fit behind it‘s wheel - even with the seat all the way back and the steering wheel tilted all the way up.
Two years ago, as I began researching weight loss surgery, I discovered that my cholesterol was not just high (200), it was astronomical (500). I was immediately put on medication, but despite that, every night as I laid my head on the pillow and my thoughts turned inward, I drifted off to sleep worrying and fearful that I might not make it until morning.
A year ago, when Alfred and the boys went out the front door to go on a walk to a store that is only about a mile away, I waited until they were gone and broke down crying because the weather was beautiful and I wanted badly to go with them but my body was not capable of that sort of adventure. I worried that not only was my obesity hindering my own life, but it was also hindering the lives of my family.
Three months ago, due to the extreme shock my body underwent post-gastric bypass surgery, I worried as my hair began to rapidly fall out. I braced myself for the fact that I was going to have to embrace either wearing a wig or the Sinead O’Conner look.
That’s a whole lotta worry.
Fast forward to today.
My blood pressure has been stable and normal for a few months even after being taken off of one medication. The doctor said he fully anticipates that I’ll be off all medication by my one year check up.
The same car that broke down three years ago is currently broke down again. But this time I can not only drive the second vehicle, I can even strap my seat belt.
I've now been without cholesterol medication for six months. A few weeks ago I had blood work done and I fall within the normal range.
Yesterday I needed something from the hardware store. Instead of driving, the boys and I got our shoes and coats on and the three of us walked that same mile to the store that brought me to tears last year. And except for the fact that my four year old karate kicked the whole time instead of walking and screamed/sang “It’s the Final Countdown” the entire way there and back, it was a pretty pleasant and easy walk.
My hair has stopped falling out. And you know what? I actually like my hair better now. It was so thick before that it was heavy, took forever to dry, and was just kind of blah. Now that it’s thinned out some and I had the dead ends cut off and found some decent styling products (one of the perks of your best friend owning a salon), it has developed some curl and is easier to manage.
The scale tells me that I have lost a lot of weight. 118 pounds. I praise God for that every day. But BY FAR, the weight of worry that was lifted off of my very weary shoulders has surpassed any number that the scale can give me.
“Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up.” Proverbs 12:25
“Out of my distress I called on the Lord; the Lord answered me and set me free.” Psalm 118:5