Do you ever feel like there is a struggle you have that never ceases to try and choke the life out of you?  Is there something that weighs on you constantly, just lurking in the background reminding you that you are a failure, headed for disaster, or never going to be happy? 

Guilt, fear, worry, anger, doubt, hatred, bitterness…they are all things that imprison us in our own minds, blocking out any shot at full joy and peace of mind.  

The enemy wants you to believe that you are on your own.  He wants you to believe that the stronghold that has a grip on your throat is stronger than you are.

He is the father of lies!

You have a strong deliverer.  The same God that is mighty enough to speak the universe into existence, control everything from the ant to the oceans, and breathe life back into his dead son is currently engaged in a personal battle for YOU.  But the battle He is fighting is not with Satan.  He has already beaten him.  His battle is with US.  We are the ones who choose to not be on his side.  We are the ones who have the power to decide who we will serve.  We are the ones who make the choice to take the hard path by rejecting the victory he is offering us.

Let Him set you free.

“Some sat in darkness and deepest gloom,
imprisoned in iron chains of misery.

They rebelled against the words of God,
scorning the counsel of the Most High.

That is why he broke them with hard labor;
they fell, and no one was there to help them.

LORD, help!” they cried in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.

He led them from the darkness and deepest gloom;
he snapped their chains.

Let them praise the LORD for his great love
and for the wonderful things he has done for them.

For he broke down their prison gates of bronze;
he cut apart their bars of iron.”

Psalm 107:10-16

I am a sucker for these things.  This one's for you Alfred!

I recently read a stat that said that the county I live in is one of the fattest counties in the state of Ohio.  Now I know why.  I am going to blame it all on the local school system.

Have you ever been forced to stay cooped up in a three bedroom house with two active (and dare I say HYPER active) boys who are confined to stay indoors due to the fact that is negative 1 billion degrees outside?  Well I have. And it’s not pretty. And if there is one thing that makes me want to gorge myself on mashed potatoes and chocolate cake, it would be this.

Since my brain has officially shorted out I may have lost count, but I believe that today marks the seventh snow day in the past few weeks here in SE Ohio.  This count does not include several 2 hour delays that we have had as well.  Call me grumpy but all of this togetherness and love is getting old.  I love my boys more than I can express appropriately with words but wow…I mean WOW.  Who knew the severity of what cabin fever can do to a parent’s mental capacities.

I see everyone posting on Facebook things like, “Yay! Another day to cuddle with the kids on the couch watching movies and eating gooey chocolate chip cookies and hot chocolate while we listen to the snap, crackle, pop of the fireplace and watch the gentle falling snow through the frosty front window.”  As where with me, I am thinking my post would go something more along the lines of:

Oh. My. Word.  Please…not ANOTHER day of sitting on the couch. I love my kids. I really do. But I like them a lot more when we don’t have to share the same 500 square feet of space for days on end. I can’t handle one more “mommmm, I’m hungry” (despite the fact that we ate lunch 20 minutes ago). And if I have to watch The Incredibles or Wild Kratts for one more minute, I’m gonna blow.  I’m on the South Beach diet so if I want to sit and cuddle on the couch with the kids and have comfort food, it’s not nearly as warm and fuzzy to eat a spinach salad or a piece of baked chicken as it is to have cookies and hot chocolate.  Also, it’s not cozy outside, it’s deadly.  That’s why the county is shut down people. Oh, and our fireplace is gas and pretty much just decorative.  If I attempted to light it, I may blow the house up.  And if I don’t, my one year old would have this place burnt down in 0.3 seconds flat anyway.  He is not one to be trifled with.

How’s that for positivity?

So back to my original point.  Being fat.  It’s the school’s fault.  In their snow wimpiness, they single-handedly thwart the efforts of all types of dysfunctional eaters.  If you are a stress eater, don’t come here.  Not today.  If you are a mindless grazer, I can guarantee you that you will feel your brain leave your head in less than an hour and before you know it, an empty bag of chips will mysteriously be in your hand, you‘ll have crumbs on your shirt and you‘ll feel a random sense of disgust with yourself.  If you eat out of boredom, unless you find makeup school work and laundry exciting, you might want to find somewhere else to be.  And if you use food as a reward, you can come over - but when the day is done and the kids make it to bed alive, you’ll have to leave for your reward because again, cheesesticks and celery leave a bit to be desired.

My husband chaplains (yes, I’m using it as a verb) for three prisons here in Ohio.  In doing so, he has been privileged enough to witness some powerfully amazing spiritual transformations.  He’s seen drug dealers, gang members, murderers, and rapists weep tears of sorrow as the scope of what their sin has done sinks in.  He has seen those same men yell “Hallelujah” at the top of their lungs and seriously dance as they celebrate their new life with God and have their sins forgiven.

Being a part of these transformations is emotional for me, and I only get to witness a lot of this stuff second hand via cards, letters, and the occasional visit.  The mama bear comes out in me when I see a new Christian trying to walk on the right path and hear of others who are actively trying to thwart forward spiritual progress.

Christians in prison have a rough go of it. Other inmates will be purposefully abusive and then be quick to remind you that you are supposed to turn the other cheek.  Your stuff will be stolen and then you’ll be told that a Christian should always be willing to give to the needy. You can be physically beaten just for the heck of it. And the verbal assaults…well from what I have heard, they are pretty much just continual.  If you were in a gang in prison and then become a Christian and have to remove yourself from the gang, it can literally be a life threatening decision.  Then, once you are released from prison, you have a record, no money, nowhere to live sometimes, social stigmas to overcome, and parole rules to uphold very strictly.  Trying to make a living while getting all of that other stuff straight while still trying to live a Biblical and moral life can be nearly impossible.

But with all of these things working against them, would you like to know what the number one thing (by far) is that I have witnessed that throws these men off of their track to success?  Surprisingly it is not drugs, alcohol, or money.  The thing that gets these guys each and every time is getting involved in toxic relationships.  They get out of jail, they are lonely, and without fail a woman comes along and starts to show interest.  Sometimes it’s clear that the relationship part isn’t even necessary, sex alone will work just fine.  

Sometimes the women are up front and obviously not interested in spiritual things.  It’s easy (or at least easier) for someone who is trying to serve God to spot these types and avoid them because ultimately, avoiding those relationships are just a matter of controlling your flesh.  But sometimes things get a little more blurry.  The woman claims to be searching for God herself.  She tells him she just needs time.  In one breath she asks them to teach her how to be a good Christian while the whole time, her actions speak to the fact that she has no real interest in changing anything.  She keeps the man hanging by a thread of hope that someday she will become a faithful woman of God, they can raise faithful, happy kids, and they can all ride off into the sunset together, singing hymns as they go.

I don’t want to be a cynic.  I really don’t.  I think it’s wonderful for people to want to share the Lord with whoever crosses their path.  But keeping it real, the Bible is pretty clear about being unequally yoked.  It’s not a good thing…ever.  When you and the person you choose to be in a relationship with are on obvious different planes when it comes to the single most important thing in your life (your relationship and responsibility towards God), you are willingly putting yourself into a situation that is going to make it more difficult for you to succeed.

But it’s never so simple is it?  There is always a catch that makes it more complicated.  There is always a catch that delays things for just long enough for a deep attachment to form, making it infinitely more difficult to think rationally and spiritually about the true nature of the relationship.

• “I’ve known them since I was little. We’ve got a lot of history together.”
  
• “They have had a rough life. They just need someone to help them through this stage and then they will be on fire for the Lord.”
  
• “They just started this journey.”
  
• “They are taking things one step at a time. First they have to (fill in the blank) and then they can really work on spiritual things.”
  

I know I sound like I am a cold hearted person. But trust me.  Seriously - I get it.  I’ve been in pseudo relationships that have taken me away from God.  I also know that being in a relationship (or even married) to someone who is not ACTIVELY and INTENTIONALLY helping you get to Heaven is not from God.  And if it’s not from God, who is it from?  It is from Satan.  Ouch.

Does God expect you to just walk away from a relationship that is keeping you from fulfilling your full potential in Him?  Would He actually ask you sacrifice happiness for holiness?  I think it’s clear that Biblically speaking, unless you have already committed in marriage to this person, the answer is yes.  The following scriptures seem to be more than just suggestions…they seem to be commands.

“Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14

“Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them. For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” Ephesians 5:6-11

God never said it would be easy.  But trust me…it will be a lot easier to choose a person to be with who is spiritually mature than it will be if you choose to try and get someone and change them into what it is that you think they should be.  It’s cliché but it’s true.

And speaking honestly, if you truly believe the person you are with is seeking God in his/her life with the full-out commitment that God is looking for, won’t it be obvious?  Their fruit will bear them out.  “You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act.” Matthew 7:16  If you find that you are the one who is constantly having to rescue your significant other from the damages caused by their own poor moral choices, chances are you are on different planes.  If you find you are constantly making excuses to others for bad moral behavior, chances are you are unequally yoked.  If the person you are with tempts you to live, act, or think in any way contrary to God’s will for you, it’s not what God wants for you.

“Don’t be deceived, evil companions corrupt good morals.”  Every single time.  It’s your choice.

I have been circling this mountain for long enough.  It’s time to turn north.

Since I was about 16 my mind has been on an upward climb that has taken too much of my energy.  The struggle has consumed too many thoughts, wasted too many emotions, and caused too many wounds.  It’s time to move past it.

I’ve been circling.  But it’s time to turn north.

For me it was my dependence on food.  Maybe for you it is drugs. Maybe it’s bitterness, grief, lust, laziness, fear, depression or any other problem that has turned your heart and your mind away from your intended purpose.

It’s time to stop walking in circles. Turn north. 

In my trek around and around this mountain I have gotten tired, lost faith in myself, forgot which direction to move, and gotten disoriented.  I forgot where my strength lies.

But it is finally time to stop circling,  I have a new direction. I am turning north.

Praise God for the Bible and His words that never stop revealing new truths that have the power to illuminate and refresh tired souls.

I am turning north. And HE will lead me to victory.

“And the Lord spoke to me, saying, ‘You have circled this mountain long enough. Now turn north…For the Lord your God has blessed you in all that you have done; He has known your wanderings through this great wilderness” Deuteronomy 2:2-3, 7

Yesterday was not a good day for me.

I am doing the South Beach Diet.  If you aren’t familiar with it, it basically encourages you to eat lean meats, non-starchy vegetables, reduced fat dairy, nuts and it requires you to cut out all white flour, potatoes, and rice, and use good oils instead of butter or vegetable oil.  You can have limited carbs as long as they are whole grain.

Well throughout the day yesterday I had some cheesy vegetable casserole stuff (definitely not reduced fat cheese I’m sure), some banana pudding (with a Nilla wafer on top), a generous helping of spaghetti (not whole grain), grilled cheese (on white bread), and about six Keebler Fudge Stripe cookies.  Yeah, I said it.  Six.

I’d like to say that I just nibbled here and there and before I knew it had accumulated a week’s worth of my cheating but that wasn’t the case.  I was fully aware going into each and every decision that I shouldn’t be partaking in it.  During the six cookie debacle, I felt like I was in a sitcom.  I had been upset about something and was in my car.  I had tears running down my cheeks as I mindlessly put the cookies in my mouth.  I even made a conscious note to myself.  “Rhonda,” I said, “you are emotionally eating right now.  You’re not even hungry.”  Unfortunately, the response to myself probably would’ve been something like, “Yeah, I am aware of that you big dummy.  Just try and stop me.”

It wasn’t pretty.

I noticed yesterday a weird sort of defiance in myself when it came to food.  Each time I ate something I knew I shouldn’t have, it almost felt like I was doing it out of a sense of spite.  Spite towards who or what, I am not sure.  I’m still trying to figure that out.  It was almost like I’d take a bite of spaghetti and say, “take that!”  But again - the only one I was hurting was myself so I don’t know what the deal is there.

This morning I feel more clearheaded and can see the dysfunction in my eating habits yesterday.   I guess all I can do today is try to learn from my mistakes, right?

On a positive note, I am back on the wagon this morning.  Typically in the past, I would have threw in the towel for the week (because I have some weird OCD-ish thing about starting on Mondays).  I also would have felt defeated on a larger level.  Today I am not discouraged about the big picture. I realize these days may happen now and then and that I just need to quickly brush myself off and keep going.  

Like Dory from Finding Nemo would say, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.”

This morning as I got our son out the door to get on the bus, I was taken back by the sunrise. It was incredibly bright and to my amazement, it just kept getting brighter and brighter.  Due to my poor photography skills, the rays of light that were coming out of the center aren’t visible.  Due to the fact that this is 2014 and not 2314, I am still unable to digitally share with you the warm-ish breeze that was blowing in my front door despite it being mid-January.  And due to the fact that you may not know my attention span challenged 7 year old, you can’t fully understand what an unusual thing this sunrise must have been for him to even stop and say, “Whoa, the sky is bright this morning.”  It was a powerful display of beauty.

Several weeks ago my husband and I got to go out on a date by ourselves.  I had been starving prior to us having dinner and we decided to go to a local steak place.  Normally, my frugal side kicks in and I get cheap right before I order my meal.  I usually end up going for the chicken or pasta because the price tag on the steaks is a little more than I can bear, but this day we had a little extra money and I was feeling a little froggy.  I went for my favorite, the blackened ribeye - medium (as a side note, I’ve had to fight with the spell check on my computer for 5 minutes to get it to stop changing “ribeye” into “redeye”).  Anyway, once my steak came, it was cooked perfectly.  It was juicy, it had lots of flavor, it was tender…I enjoyed every last bite of it.  Even now, just thinking about that steak is making my mouth water.

What is frustrating for me is that there are some things, no matter how hard I may try, that I can’t convey to you accurately enough or strongly enough to make you REALLY feel what I felt.  You could say to me, “yeah, that IS a really bright sky.”  You could even appreciate the experience that I had and share in it slightly, but chances are that the picture taken from my cell phone and posted on the internet isn’t going to cause you to have a moment of awe at God’s creation.  You can agree with me that steak is good, but chances are, you can’t fully appreciate the level of satisfaction that I gained from that particular steak.

The same is true with so much.  I’ve been told all my life by people who have lost weight that it just takes buckling down, eating right, and exercising.  They say that once you do it and the weight starts coming off, life improved by leaps and bounds and you really start to feel better about yourself.  I believe every single person who ever told me that, but that is not the same as experiencing it for myself.  Weigh in was today and I am down another 2 lbs (which makes me one step closer to that experience) but I’m not there yet.  I’m sure people who have already done it get frustrated with people who haven’t and just want to yell, “DON’T STOP! KEEP GOING!  IT WILL ALL BE WORTH IT!”  But despite their vehemence, sometimes us listeners just can’t grasp that reality.

I see people around me struggling with job stress, money problems, addictions, bad marriages, bad kids, health problems, feeling unappreciated, loneliness, and a myriad of other problems.  And for the people who are trying to get through these things without an all-knowing, all-powerful God behind them, I just want to yell, “DON’T TRY TO DO IT ALONE! IT’S SO MUCH EASIER IF YOU TRUST GOD WITH YOUR HEART AND LIFE!”  I can talk til I’m blue in the face about the peace that I’ve found in knowing that as long as I am trying to do God’s will, everything else will work out one way or the other. But unless you’ve let go and felt that for yourself, there isn’t an accurate way for me to get you share in that experience with me.

Even King David understood that.  In Psalm 34, he spends the first 7 verses talking about the goodness of the Lord.  He says, “I will praise the Lord at all times.  I will constantly speak his praises.  I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart.  Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt his name together. I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me. He freed me from all my fears. Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces.  In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened; he saved me from all my troubles. For the angel of the Lord is a guard; he surrounds and defends all who fear him.”

But even he understood that his words weren’t enough.  The next verse says it all.  He says in Psalm 34:8, “Taste and see that the Lord is good.”  He knew that even though he just gave several reasons and examples why God is good, you would have to taste it for yourself in order to fully experience it.
So today I would just ask you to take a bite.  You don’t have to feel the full experience that I and others have had, but at least trust the people who have been through it (whatever your “it” is) enough to give it a shot.  Even Paul, in the book of Romans says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by TESTING you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Like LeVar Burton would always say on Reading Rainbow, “Don’t take my word for it!”

(Oh, and another side note - that sweet truck in the picture is for sale.  It’s my sister’s and yes, it is as cool as it looks).

Pet Peeve time.

I really get really irritated when I hear people say things like, “How is it that we are the only country in the world where our poorest people are also our fattest people?”  Now granted, I almost always hear things like that when I dumbly decide to tune into some conservative AM radio station to pass the time on a long drive or something.  I should know better.  But I am a glutton for punishment.

But seriously…every time I hear that I want to claw my eyes out.  It represents such a disconnect between the haves and the have nots.  There is this sentiment behind statements like that which imply that the reason why poor people are fat is because it’s just another product of their own laziness.

I’ve been poor. I’m still fat. So I can speak from personal experience when I tell you that eating cheaply AND healthily is a near impossibility.  If you haven’t been poor, let me clarify - I’m not talking about the kind of poor where if you prioritized, you could find space in the budget for healthy food.  I’m talking about a weekly grocery budget of $30 for a family of 3.  I’m talking about having to trust that God would somehow provide you with tomorrow’s meals because you just aren’t sure where they are going to come from.  I’m talking about adding water to your gallon of milk so that there is enough left for more than one bowl of cereal.  That’s the kind of poor I’m talking about.

Right now I am doing the South Beach Diet.  I like it.  But it’s biggest downfall - it is expensive.  It calls for lots of lean meats, fresh vegetables, reduced fat cheeses, and nuts. When those are some of the main staples in your diet, the grocery tab ads up very quickly. When I go to the grocery store and watch the price tag rise on my cart full of groceries, it makes me feel a little panicky.  I have to continually remind myself that it’s worth it.

So what are some of the cheapest, most economical foods that seem to stretch the furthest for your dollar?

A box of spaghetti - $1.25
Ramen noodles - .26 cents each
10 pound bag of potatoes - $3.99
White rice - .78 cents a bag
Boxed mac-n-cheese .69 cents a box
Boxes of cereal $2-3 a box
Banquet frozen dinners and/or pizzas $1.25 a piece
Loaf of white bread $1.25
Instant oatmeal - 12 packs for $1.99

Now in comparison let’s look at some prices for a few healthier choices and pay attention to how long each would last as well - because when you are poor, it’s all about stretching a meal for as long as possible.

Boneless skinless chicken breast $1.99 lb
Ground turkey $3 a pound
Almonds $6.99 a bag
Loaf of whole grain bread $2 a loaf (if not more)
Salad - lettuce .79 cents, tomatoes $1.99 lb , cheese, $2.50 & dressing, $2 for a total of about  $7 and that‘s not enough to serve as a whole meal for a family.
Low fat/light/low sugar/low sodium anything is always more expensive than their less healthy counterpart.
Steel Cut Oatmeal $3.79 for a small container

Get my point?  Yes, I know that there are exceptions. A rotisserie chicken can be bought and used for several meals for around $5.  You can (for a small price increase) replace regular spaghetti with whole grain noodles.  But for the sake of my argument, you can see what I am trying to say.  It is much easier and generally cheaper to eat foods that are highly processed and full of weight-gain causing carbohydrates.

So if you have heard statements like that and bought into them, next time stop and think about how sometimes people are forced to choose between dinner or the electric bill.  Try not to be too judgmental if they choose the $1 McDonalds cheeseburger over the $6 McDonalds grilled chicken wrap.  That additional $5 they saved could potentially be used to pay for another day’s worth of food.

And as a side note, should you ever decide to take someone groceries who needs them, just to be nice - throw in some fresh fruit and/or vegetables.  When you are scraping the bottom of the barrel, things like apples, oranges, melons, asparagus, berries, broccoli, and cauliflower are rarities.  It would make their day.

I digress.  So help me if I ever see Ann Coulter on the street.  Her and I are gonna have words.  I’ll show her what the fat and poor people in America are capable of. 

If you just want a little bit of success at something, then just put in a little effort.  If you’d like to be above average…put in more effort than people around you.  But if you want to excel at something and honestly be the very best you can be, you have to go all in and be completely sold out.  Completely.  I’m not sure I can emphasize that word enough. COM-PLETE-LY.

I’m not there with weight loss…but I’m o.k. with that.  I don’t want to be a total sellout to my physical body.  I feel like I’m doing well.  Sure, I do need to put even more effort in than what I do (and I am working on that), but I do not want my life to be defined by a measurement of how much or little gravity it takes to keep me on the ground.

I’m not there with my family, and again - I am at peace with that knowledge.  Are they the most important people on this earth to me?  Yes.  Would I die for them?  I would like to say that I would.  At times I do I obsess with thoughts surrounding my marriage and the well-being of my kids?  More than I probably should.  But even in that, I’m not completely sold out to them.  There is still a small part of me that is reserved for things that are more important.

I AM completely sold out to God.  I can finally say that.

That doesn’t mean that I have achieved some level of goodness that has been set before me. I sin.  Sometimes I sin a lot.  It does not mean that I am doing everything I should or accepting everything God is trying to offer me.  I can be lazy and I can feel unworthy.  And it doesn’t mean that I understand all things spiritual. Sometimes I read my Bible and despite re-reading the same 5 verses over and over, I can’t even grasp what the main topic is.

What it does mean is that I am finally in a place in my life where I realize that no matter what it is that I am doing or facing, there is only one thing that matters.  One.  There is only One way for the deep problems of my life and in the world in general to be healed.  I can look to money, education, family, medication, counseling, or other people to make me better and rescue me from the dark places where I sometimes fall, but ultimately none of that will work.

I’m sold.  I’m sold on the fact that God is the only way.  HIS will for me is the only one that will work.  And it wasn’t until I  let go of my own will and collapsed into that truth that I found peace.

And now that I have tasted that freedom, I can’t help but want to stop and scream at people who I still see striving to do things their own way.  I want to take my heart that is filled with gratitude and trust in God and put it in the body of the person who is stressing and clawing to try and find solutions to their problems.  I just want them to feel, for just one second, how freeing it is to be sold out.   Dying to myself (to my own thoughts about what is best for me) and just doing what God leads me to do doesn’t sound like it would be pleasant, I know.  But in a very real way, giving up control and letting someone else (someone with an all encompassing and eternal perspective of things) take the wheel, is incredible.

Jesus said he is THE WAY, THE TRUTH, and THE LIFE.  He is the only way.  His is the only truth. He is the only way to have true life.  Just keep reading and saying that over and over until it sinks in. When it finally hits you and  you embrace it, He will change you from the inside out and give you the peace that passes all understanding.

But it has to be completely.  (Did I already mention that?)

There are trends that start every so often that just seem to catch on for some reason.  For a while it was chipotle.  Everything seemed to have chipotle peppers as one of the featured ingredients.  Then we had the olive oil phase.  Even shampoo was “infused with restorative powers of olive oil.”  Recently it’s bacon - which honestly, may be the best thing ever (unless you are trying to actually extend your life).  Regardless of what the focal point actually is, there is always something that seems to be the latest rage in marketing.

The same is true when it comes to the way we, as a society, think and behave.  For example, it used to be the cool thing to say “I don’t care what anyone thinks, I just say what’s on my mind.”  That was great at first. If someone said that we would all sit and watch them, impressed (and maybe even jealous) of their ability to be so bold and unafraid to be blunt.  Then, after everyone started adopting this philosophy, it became clear that it wasn’t actually a good thing, it usually just hurt people’s feelings and was the mark of a fool (“There is more hope for a fool than for someone who speaks without thinking.” - Proverbs 29:20).

Whole blogs have been dedicated to the various hot trends in parenting. I refuse to be engaged when it comes to these.  As a matter of fact, I have adopted the “don’t ask don’t tell” philosophy in my parenting.  I’ve had one too many run-ins with rabid anti-immunization moms. They scare me.  Seriously ladies, take one step closer and so help me, I will pull out my dirty syringe filled with DTaP and MMR antibodies and STAB you!  (Just kidding. Please don’t’ hurt me.)

ANYWAY…I am talking about these types of trends because it seems like around this time of year, all of a sudden it seems like the cool thing to say now is, “I don’t make resolutions.”  Well I say that is just dumb.  For forever, this time of year has been a time when we all looked forward to new beginnings and starting over and wiping the slate of the last year clean.  How could that be a bad thing?  Simply because most of us don’t stick to our resolutions, that doesn’t mean that we should stop trying. I think this new trend of apathy is doo-doo (as my 7 year old so eloquently says).

I’m gonna go nerd on you.  The month of January was named after the Roman god Janus.  Old Janus was considered to be the god of beginnings or transitions (much cooler god than say, Summanus - the god of nighttime thunder).  Janus was also considered the god of gates, doors, passages, endings and time. He is depicted as having two faces, since he looks to the future and to the past.  He is sometimes referred to as “The Beginner.”  The whole month of January is centered around this idea of examining what we’ve done in the past, seeing where we can improve, and then looking to the future.

I don’t care what you say, you can’t make me feel dumb for resolving to be better this year.  I’m starting over.  Again. And I’ll do it next year too if I have to.  So my resolutions this year are as follows:

• To lose at least 60 pounds (5 pounds a month should be very doable if I remain focused).
  
• To be more patient with my children.
  
• To edify and encourage people around me more

I may not succeed at all of them, but I am going to at least try.  All you non-resolutioners can just back off - I'll stab you too.  (How is that for edifying?)

“I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead” Philippians 3:12-13